long weekend

so last weekend was a big one, we had our championship bout on saturday, so i did my pre-bout meditation all day. that means i did nothing and thought of nothing. if i would start to think about the bout, i'd say things like, "you're going to get hit really hard tonight, it's going to really hurt." then i'd get nervous and worried and feel sick. so i took a nap in the back yard, stayed in my jammies all day, and ate like a pig. and it worked, i didn't get nervous, even 30 minutes up until the bout when we're warming up and tweedle dip and tweedle shit tried to raz me, i was like whatever and took it easy. and i didn't get hurt, besides the fat lip i got from taking one of the tweedles out hard, yesss. but alas, the mkm had to give their 06 championship trophy to the hood ratz, it was a good game, and i'm happy to say it was a close game. the next morning i had to get to columbia missouri to assist a friend from sf who flew out to photograph a wedding, for some reason i though it would take me 3 1/2 hours to get there. wrong, it's 6. but that's cool, i made some dough and got to hang out with traci for a bit. the bride and groom live in sf, but she went to school in columbia, so for one reason or another they got married in columbia. tons of young hip successful people flew in from all over, including ireland, and watching everyone dance made me feel the pain of leaving sf. i felt the separation widening, the choice to move to the midwest, and that intangible west coastness taunting me. as we stood outside getting ready to leave, a bunch of guys who wanted to talk to traci (she's irresistible) crowded around. they're all drunk and trying to impress us with their camera knowledge, saying things like "180 3.5, what do you think of that? yeah." "i'm old school & i use 44mm, you've probably never heard of it." and other such embarrassing statements which were oddly aggressive when you think about how they're trying to get their audience to like them. and you couldn't talk with them, or correct them, or argue with them, i could barely hold my vomit in. i got over any ideas of how cool the crowd was about then. we went to an after party where this girl told me about how her friend wanted a pair of baby goats to walk down the isle at her wedding. the girl bought two pygmy goats and tried to train them to walk in a straight path for two months before the wedding in her sf backyard. she said they cried all the time and the police came, and when the wedding happened for the friend, the goats just ate the floral decorations. now that i think of it, that's a pretty amazing story and could be a tall tale. but it passed the time. then yesterday there was this huge crazy parade in front of the hotel in columbia with the biggest flag i've ever seen, the only one bigger is taht one on west o at the gas station. so i watched that, and then drove the long drive home, and took some pictures.

happy memorial day

the mooney suzuki

here's some photos of the mooney suzuki when they came to town, finally getting them up.
this weekend was crazy, so many birthdays and derby promo things. rode a bull, washed a car, drank waaaaay too much lately; this will be followed by a somber and sober period of reflection. but since i found my planner/journal after losing it for a few weeks, i won't be lonely. i can write bad poetry about sorrowful hearts and all that. god, i think i've been crying alot too, even untanked. lame.
i've been getting alot of emails from dudes i don't want to talk to lately, and they keep on writing even when i don't respond. dang it!you know, i just want to email and say "i don't have time for you" "i don't know you" "i wish i didn't know you" "i don't care" or something nicer, but even nicer will sound bad and bitchy. but you can't write a nice email, then they think you two have a thing going. and that's not what we want.
oh, and i DID NOT have a hot date this weekend, so much for all my bragging.
it's 3 in the morning, and i'm just kind of sad. i wish i was a more responsible friend to my people, i wish i was more responsible, i want this week to go well.

happy b-day me!!

now watch this one for the wrap up.

and i quote

"he better thank his lucky stars for the day he got that girl pregnant."

sioux falls!

wooo hooo!
i think i may have got some good photos at least, memories. memories of champ pain shaking her money maker, check back for it and be amazed.
i wish i could just say all sorts of stuff taht's on my mind, but because of the 3 people who ever check this blog, i can't won't shouldn't couldn't will never say who i'm mad at, or what joint is currently injured, or what boy i like, or what interesting thing i did the night before.
chris mcv just sent me a mix tape, i think i mentioned it already, and i can't express how much it rules. when we got into the van to drive to sioux falls, i wanted to kick myself cuz the van had a tape player and i didn't bring my only tape i have anymore!
ok, i'll say something i hate and not say names, but i hate people who you can't say one thing without them saying some smart ass remark back. like, maybe you're trying to joke around or be funny or not even that interesting, and they have to make a comment that is not funny or joking or whatevs, but is maybe meant to show how clever they are, or how much more smart they are than you or try to shut you down or something. i don't get it. why? i like to attribute this special quality to them being insecure or wanting to impress me, but i don't know. maybe some people are just jerks naturally and don't even think about it.
i would also like to say that every guy i've had a crush on since i moved back in january (only 2 fellas) has failed to meet my expectations. not that i think they're bad, just not who i thought they were, as i'm over whatever i thought was so cool about them in the first place.
today was mother's day, or i guess technically yesterday. tasha and i got our mom a flask with "mom" and two clinking martini glasses engraved on it, it looks great. she's not a lush though. swear.

pam got a bath

remember, come to pershing tomorrow night and see mary kay mafia vs the hood ratz!!

feet

you remember how when you turn that age where you stop dressing punk, but don't really know what else to be, so you make all these bad fashion decisions? and you shop at the mall or sears and try to reinvent what's cool for you, and then finally, years YEARS years later, you figure out what you like again besides butt flaps and combat boots. i was digging my clothes for the most part in sf, and they've translated more or less here in nebraska, until recently. the problem? sandals. what do you do about sandals? the only times i've worn sandals in the last bazillion years is when i've been traveling, and they've been awful piles of 3rd world rubber that i cringe to think about. san fran isn't warm enough to wear sandals or shorts, so i've been able to avoid the subject all together, but now nebraska's getting hot and i'm going to have to take the plunge. i got some today, and when i showed them to lizzy, she was didn't say anything except, "i wouldn't have picked out those sandals for you." and i'm like, i know! i don't know what kind of sandals i'd pick out for me! they're not my style! they do not go with my idea of myself at all! but they're quite comfortable, i can wear them out in the garden, or on a walk, and maybe if i do it right, can wear them out in public. sandals. is the world ready for taura's troll toes? i don't know...
on another note, i still think i fractured a rib.

vote

"It's the support of the corporate community that helps spread the value of art throughout our great city."
- svoboda, one of lincoln's mayorial canditates which we are voting on today. when i say "we", i mean the people of lincoln as i'm not registered yet.

today it was hot hot hot. where did spring go? winter was kicking my ass, and then it rained and now it's smoking hot? naw, can't be. all my plants are sort of dying, lame. someone said it was 95 out. now they're certainly dead.
i'm cranky today, maybe had something to do with having food poisening all night long and not getting good sleep. i did not want to go to practice AT ALL today, but i did anyways, and those fish sticks at the rink didn't turn on the ac, so i was sweating before we even started stretching. the whole time i wanted to throw up, my helmet was just soaked with sweat, and my chest just hurt. my dad thinks i may have fractured a rib, and there's nothing you can do about that. lame lame.
these two pics are from my last visit with my parents at carmel ca. they look so nice and cool now. dang i miss sf.

went to nolan's art show tonight at the beemis underground, it was awesome! he did collaborations with a bunch of people, a quilt, an installation, his puppet show movie(?) "milk", a computer thing, and all sorts of other fun things besides his numerous wonderful paintings. not only that, tunz of people were there, and i got to chat with the best of the midwest in an hour span of time. word.
i hurt soooo bad, all over. it even hurts to breathe. thank you derby!
it's gonna get busy soon, next weekend is the hood ratz vs mary kay mafia (my second bout!!) then the weekend after that gang green goes up to sioux falls to bout the team up there. i turn 30 a few days later, and the weekend after my birthday i'm going with my parents & their potluck club up to calamus and camp along with some of people's cool kids my age. then in june my mom and i are going on our 10 day long photo camping nebraska trip, that will rule. and of course there are things to do with derby, like fac things, and other events. last weekend we went to the stars game and i got to go out on the ice and throw t-shirts to the crowd.
oh yeah, i forgot, i said some funny things recently! the other day at practice a girl stumbled and fell, landing right on a wheel. we didn't know what was wrong cuz she's all laying on the ground in pain, and we're like, "did you land on your tailbone? did you land on your ankle?" and she finally says, "i landed on my poon." and everyone is saying, "awww! oh geez, do you want some ice? someone go get her some ice!" and i open my mouth and say, "do you want a popsicle?" and no one knew i said it but girls repeated it and were laughing and asking who said it. i felt proud. and yesterday (thursday) i went with a few girls playing in the next bout to kzum and talked on the radio and gave away tickets. 2 of the girls were good at being responsible and explaining things, and then there was me talking trash to one of the other girls the whole time. it was fun. and of course i forgot to tell anyone i was going to be on the radio, so no one i knew listened. dang.

fantastic

i have this fantastic habit of falling for guys with girlfriends. maybe it's because they've lost the desperation that clings to single guys thicker than ball sweat, and are able to just chill and be themselves instead of trying to get their, um, foot in the door. and of course they never leave their girlfriends cuz they're honorable (i don't fall for the other kind, don't you know). so i'm resigned to be their best buddy and feel sorry for myself. very sorry.
today i made a to do list that spans things from 3 months ago to june. i think it's 47 items long. it has everything from emailing people back and cleaning my room to buying presents and make some money.

more photos than you ever want to really look at...
rocknrollerderby!
mudfest!!
jan 07 awards!!!
dec 05 practice!!!!

grudge match! tonight

what i've been doing

here's my team mkm, and me, skelataura

god, sooo busy i don't even have time to wrap things up!! they just keep coming and coming. maybe this weekend i'll get some time. i'm showing some work at bella spa on cooper st, the opening is this wednesday and it'll be awesome. this photo, among others, is in it. last weekend was mudfest. we had games and derby girls wrestling in pudding, i think i finally got the last out of my ears. today i started a new job, i get to work with some awesome people and maybe i'll find a good flute teacher and bust out the electric flute proper on the world. i have a couple photo jobs in the works, and of course i need to find some time for roundus. plus we have a bout on the 14th, and my class at unl. gooooo to sleeeep now!!!

gosh, so much happened over the weekend, i don't know where to start. biggest news, gang green vs. hood ratz at pershing! the first derby bout of the season, tons of people were there, the teams were ready to kill, and it was a great time. i took photos and a little video, and had power difficulties the whole time. i about pulled my hair out it was so frustrating. but, i think i have a few photos that'll work. the hood ratz won, they were fast and vicious, and gang green played very well, keeping up and continually scoring points the whole time. afterwards, derby girls and fans went to duffy's and everyone got riled up and it got crazy. let's just say that. at the bout, people threw beer, there were fights, huge hits and firey crashes, spectacular jammers and massive points. hood ratz had grillz, gang green had their own trading cards, the photographer had pink lame hot pants...
but before the bout and the costumes and the fights, we have to practice. this is pershing auditorium without all that stuff, just a taped off track.

word...

about to go take my drivers test... we'll see how that goes.
right now i'm mad mad mad.

ahhh... miami!! got back late last night, it was rad. radder than i thought miami was going to be, but i didn't have high hopes besides a bikini parade-which it was. the convention was great, saw alot of work, heard some great speakers, and looked at alot of new equipment. looking at the work of the other convention goers was good, made me think alot about my own work... areas where i need to push myself, things that i need to do better, and ideas that just MAY BE interesting and unique to me! i did a bad job at showing my own work, at open portfolio showing and portfolio review opportunities. partly because i brought 3 bodies of work, one of which (cambodian landmine museum) is more or less finished and 3 1/2 years old , the other (sugar mountain) has sort of reached it's end or changed it's direction, and the 3rd, my tree stuff, is super "work in progress" and only has a few pieces and they're not really where i want the project to go. i think... so i did a dumb thing and didn't show it to anyone. but my mom and i had a great time, walking around with j. seely from wesleyan connecticut and eating great food.
here's something i've been doing since i moved back, panoramas. i've been working through the buildings on campus, my favorite was the beadle center's green house. it was so warm and green in there, nice especially since outside it was cold and grey. and everyone in the building was so nice to me, but they always are:) i even got lunch at one of the dorms! here's a green house pano i like.
http://www.roundus.com/viewer.php?fvr=bdlc_unlc_8&abbrev=bdlc
everyone at the spe convention had a computer, and everyone was walking around the hotel with their laptops looking for a wireless signal. that, in addition to how busy we were, didn't give me any chance to check my email. and my inbox is LOADED! most strangely, a message from someone in sf who i was very close to. i guess it's strange cuz he decided that we shouldn't say goodbye or anything, and desired an end to all communication. sometimes i have fond thoughts of our time together and miss him, but other times i get angry about our relationship. it would appear that someone would like to open up a dialog about the future, or something, i don't know. it's a shock because i honestly didn't think i'd ever hear from him again. i'm gonna have to sit with this one for a few days, just in case you're reading...

miami!!

spring break 07 here i come! well, not exactly... more like society of photographic educators national convention. which is more fun anyways! i heart spe. i just want to say that in the last few days i got 4 emails from my top fav sf boys- ted, nick, mcvick, and rickard in the last few days. i expect the messages to landslide during the next few days when the city's boys as a whole realize they miss me. to be honest tho, ted has been good at keepin in touch, rickard is from sweden(and is home safely), nick emailed me with my hacked website after i called him, and mcvick and i always talk via myspace. BUT STILL! it feels good to be in contact with the life that i left behind for this life i'm living now. ellie sent me a movie too, i will watch it enroute to miami. oh! and dax wouldn't approve my video response i left concerning his TV appearance, because of profanity. oh that dax!
oh that blogger, it's not letting me upload photos right now for some reason... later dudes!

room tour

check out my room!
i have a few more thoughts on dax flame. what ever is happening on his blog, as in if it's fake or real, rest assured something very special is going on. either he's acting and just happens to be a freaking child prodigy, or it's sincere and a strange kid is slowly finding an equilibrium and entering of the human race. (he has improved since the first blog) what ever side it's on, i hope the best for dax flame and hope he reaches the stars.

dax flame

dax flame! is it real, or isn't it? when flavor of love was on, michelle (ted's girlfriend) was convinced that new york was a performance artist, and the most brilliant one at that. it's like saying that new york is so crazy that it has to be an act, no one could actually be that crazy. would you act like that? no, but you you also wouldn't kidnap, rape and torture someone and keep them in a box under your bed until they die 40 years later. or at least i hope you wouldn't. but there are people out there that do, just like there's people out there that act like new york, and people out there who have tantrums and make great jokes on their video blog. it's a stretch i know, comparing making video blogs to murder, but this is how i come to conclusions about things. so what i'm saying is that there very well could be a lonely socially awkward teenager who makes painfully honest video blogs as a way to communicate with the outer world. word! but is it real? i don't know, and i don't know if i really care, because i want the videos to keep coming and keep abreast of dax flame's trials and tribulations. but the one where he has his study buddy over and freaks out, makes me think f-a-k-e. if dax is faking the whole thing, he's a DAMN good actor, like tops. but his friend jacob isn't. jacob's fakeness is the clincher, it's still a good blog, but feels more like a skit than truth. decide for yourself:

here's one called cool moves, it's his 2nd motion picture. are you ready for them? i don't think you are.

here's the study session i talked about.

"Two straight and unadorned columns stood on either side of the entrance, which opened, at first sight, like a single great arch; but from the columns began two embrasures that, surmounted by other, multiple arches, led the gaze, as if into the heart of the abyss, toward the doorway itself, crowned by a great tympanum, supported on the sides by two imposts and in the center by a carved pillar, which divided the entrance into two apertures protected by oak doors reinforced in metal."

holy run on sentences batgirl! now, i will admit that "the name of the rose" by umberto eco is actually much more interesting than i remembered from years ago, but passages like this cause my eyes to glaze over and decide it's time to go to sleep. this is what happened last night, i read that sentence and turned off the light, and tonight i read the sentence again and wanted to turn off the light. it's magic. but i had to drag myself out of bed and do this before i forgot.

derby derby derby derby.
i've got derby fever, though it sort of feels like the flu. go to sleep thinking about practice, dream about derby, wake up and think about derby. it feels like when i was a teenager discovering punk music: you want to devote every waking hour to everything punk and could care less about anything that isn't. maybe i should start a derby zine:)
but i did take the sodoku challenge after a brief hiatus, it's difficult to think about numbers when you're hung over. balls. instead of sodoku, i've been reading the US magazine that lizzy gave me. when my lack of popular culture (i guess that's what it's called) became shockingly real, as in me not knowing any stars or shows, she popped into my room and said, "this is to fill that black void with some information about the world." oh that lizzy! i usually feel too busy to devote much time to tv or watching movies, but i can always find time for i love new york. it's getting down to the wire folks, and it's going to get gooood! this show is almost perfect. for it to be perfect, it needs to be reno 911. now that's a show.
this is a photo of the golden gate fields' restroom, my dear friend nick worked there. i loooove to watch those ponies run.

sometimes i have to do a film developing blitz, gathering up all the random rolls hanging around my room, and see what i got. there's photos i remember taking, and then that is it. i'll wonder what ever happened to that picture, and when i develop the film, i find it. and discover it was a great photo, and i shot another photo over it by accident. dang. finding alot of photos of taka, miss that guy more than i should.

about a week ago, i had to do one of those dreadful things... the unmentionable. no, not take a dump in the toilet bowl, taking a dump on someone's feelings.
and my satellite ears overheard him comiserating with some gals who i'm sure were only too happy i'd passed on the fellow, he said, "i guess i'm just not her type." (or something to that effect, this is 2nd hand eaves dropping after all). when i heard that, i was like, "what? i never said that!" cuz i didn't, i said other stuff. but maybe he's not, and we all should just assume that when we get dumped we're just not that person's type. in one way or another.
this is how it'd go:
"yeah, i guess you're just not my type."
"what is your type then?"
"girls who only eat hamburgers and don't make me call them back."
"oh... yeah, i guess you're not my type either."
"oooh really? what's your type then?"
"guys who don't have raging ringworm and chronic unemployment."
"ha, fuck you."
"fuck you too."
"see you at pops."
"cool."

for some reason i have a pile of glow sticks on my desk.

snowy days are here again

so, once again i'll talk about the weather... it's snowy, which is very beautiful for looking at and taking photos, but bad if you need to go anywhere. it snowed the night before last, which took out the electricity, and because the snow was so deep, all this stuff was cancelled. beauty school, unl, state jobs, maybe little kid school, it was a day off for lots. lizzy and i played gin (and she beat me) for a bit until adam finished shoveling the driveway, and then we decided to jam. we're starting a band, i can't reveal the name yet, but it will have flute, moog, ukelele, computer, and maybe some other thing. it's me, lizzy, and adam, and we already have the start to our first song. don't worry, it's going to rock. at about this time in the day, tasha calls and tells me that if i want to go to adult skate tonight i need to stop jerking around and get my work done. so we wrapped up our practice and i went down and slaved away on the computer doing stuff which will eventually lend me either money or fame. adult skate was great, it was deserted. we pretty much had the rink to ourselves and could skate fast because none of the old people were there.
i got up before 10 today, it's a major accomplishment. you know how i did this? you go to bed early. but what if you're not tired? just read the book "name of the rose" by eco, it's a 14th century murder mystery set in a monastery. though interesting, it will put you to sleep.

Quotable Quotes from the hit show "I Love New York"
"I'm really feeling the fuck out of this nerd!" New York on Mr. Boston
"When you have a small dog, things can happen. Not only that, they're so cute. You can never say no." Romance on Her Majesty, New York's small dog.
"Sometimes don't you just get scared of the dark and think there's a monster over there?" Tango to Real.
Ok, so Tango never said that, I say that. someday when I have a kid they're going to say, "mommy, don't turn out the lights, i'm afraid there's a monster over there!" and i'll say, "i know! and it's really scary! good luck and don't make any noise, that's what i do. but if you have to walk through the haunted abyss, i mean dark, if you have to walk through the DARK for some reason, just sing a song like you were tina turner on sesame street. that keeps the monsters away from you until you can turn on the lights. serious! they haven't gotten me yet!"

mafioso
PASSED! yes, i passed my wftda testing that i have been so stressed out about for the last few weeks, yippie! everyone passed, doubly good. AND, after the testing was over all the rookies were drafted last night, our teams were announced and i am now on...
(i'm talking about the no coast derby in case you don't know)
the mary kay mafia!
and tasha's in...
gang green?
nooooo! why do we have to skate against each other? lizzy's on gang green too, it's going to be a strain. i know blood (and best friends) are thicker than water, but what about the team? sisters against sisters? nooooo way.
but i tell you what, mary kay mafia has the cutest uniforms!
yay me!

who knows, after tonight we may get to be the Hornettes.
NO COAST DERBY!!

i always surprise myself at how poor a friend i can act sometimes. or family member. i'm sorry. it's like i only like to concentrate on a few things at a time, like thinking about something or working towards something, and have to ignore everything else or the first things get lost. so i don't call as much as i should, or email, or send out myspace messages, or go out or whatever.
on a brighter note, we got wireless at our house! hence, the frequent blogs of late. (talking like that is great) and i can once again listen to the technicolor web of sound, and air america (it's not on today tho). and of course, my old time radio programs. never get tired of that shit. unless i've heard it before. finally finished my journey into space program, dang, maybe tomorrow i'll spend some time and talk about it. for all you journey into space fans.
it's also warm out today, and i'm going to dust off ye old bicicleta and get my ass to class. who knew, that after all this shitty winter time stuff, there would be sunshine? you never appreciate a nice day like you do after a stretch of miserable ones. yay!

ahh, i took the sodoku challenge again and i won. then i went back to a problematic puzzle and whooped it's ass. word! i mean... numbers!!
being negative isn't cool. being negative doesn't mean you're elite or knowledgeable or menacing or whatever you're trying to make people think. now, this is kid shit, stuff you should have realized a long time ago. but we all need to be reminded, as it's an easy trap to fall into. am i thinking of anyone specific? yes, several people including myself. i caught myself talking with someone about a movie i saw, marie antoinette, which i liked, but all i could say was all the ways it sucked. lame! why was i being lame, i don't know. just gotta stop.
i still don't have my pads and helmet for derby, we're waiting for them to get in at precision skate. right now i'm using someone's gigantic helmet and some second hand pads from other girls. yesterday was the first time i practiced hits, which was fun, and i can't wait for tonight! it's awesome. i need speed, i need to stop being the slowest. now if i could just get the hang of stopping... next tuesday is the day all the rookies take the test so we can get drafted and belong to a team. gang green, mary kay mafia, or the hood rats? where will i get in? who has the best outfits?
STEP AWAY FROM THE DENIM...
a few days ago tasha, my mom, and i went to tj maxxx. they must have just got in a big shipment, cuz there were soooo many cute things! i found a sweet pair of jeans, which fit perfectly. a jean expert in sf told me that when buying jeans, find the perfect fit then go a size smaller. that way when you start wearing them they'll stretch to fit just like the bigger size. if you start with the perfect size, it WILL stretch out and not be the perfect fit anymore. anyway, so i found this pair of pants and i kept these words of wisdom in my head, and looked for a size smaller. but i couldn't find a pair! the store was closing and we needed to go, and i became frantic and found a different pair of jeans that were the size i was looking for, and then just bought both pairs. when we got back home, i went to try on the second pair of jeans and boy oh boy, it was a struggle. like the waist was a better fit for my thigh than my waist. but i tugged and wiggled and pulled them on and then had to lay on the floor to button them up. but i got it done by god, while tasha and my mom looked on in horror at my efforts, and then the results. they begged me to take them back, they told me how bad they looked, but i don't know... they'll stretch out right? maybe if i wear them wet that'll help. who knows, i may lose some weight, but at this point in time it's muffin top city. the tighter the better i say.

well, i took the sodoku challenge and i crumbled. i'll finish it tomorrow i guess, man, this book is going to take me forever to get through.
the derby bout ruled last night! i was too excited to even take photos, we drank beer and yelled alot. man, it made me want to skate sooo bad, i can't wait until practice tomorrow! after the bout john w and tasha and i went to a nice restaurant where we had nice wine and nice hors d'oeuvre's and nice bread and nice oil and all that nice stuff. and then we drove home in john w's big warm truck and listened to neil young. all in all, it was a good night.

shit! i did it again! i took the sodoku challenge and i won.
tonight i'm going to crash tasha and john w's belated buddy valentine date, they're going up to omaha to eat and then to the bout between the omaha roller girls and the withita roller girls. word!
black wednesday was PACKED! had shit to do all day long, and then ended at a fancy restaurant with my valentines date, brian p. he gave me a photo of us almost 10 years ago.

things to note:
my party dress, it was a going away party for patriq and i
my bi-hawk
brian and i holding hands
brian looks the same, you could have taken the photo yesterday and he'd be wearing the same shirt.

101!!

one hundredeth and one-th post!!
i took the sokoku challenge, and i won.
if you don't already know the true panther sounds blog, stop being ignorant and check it out: http://www.truepanther.com/blog.html , i SWEAR TO GOD you will want to thank me later.
played out? i don't know, because i'm usually the last to know when something's played out, but is it good? yes. http://marmadukeexplained.blogspot.com
you know what's not fair? telling you miss someone like the desert misses the rain but don't.
you know what else is not fair? making someone's website and then disappearing.

feb update...

so what's been going on? well, i've decided to stop complaining about the cold. it gets boring, talking about all the different numbers it is outside and how they're a really big deal. it's cold and it's snowy and i don't get to ride my bike and i'm sort of getting used to it.

sweet new colors, i know.
i was sick last week, that sucked. i'm almost better now so that's good.
my phone broke but then i got a new one and it's brown and not pink.
i punched a girl in the face, but only after she punched my sister and i, and has been a pain in the ass for the last 10 years.
been meeting people, that's cool.
but best of all, i've been going to the no coast derby girls practices these last few weeks and at the end of the month all the rookies will get put onto teams. drafted like! tasha is back, and since there weren't teams yet when she was involved back when it started, she's considered a rookie. but she doesn't skate like one!! lizzy is a derby girl too, she's been with it for a while, and it's fun for all of us to go to practice together and do shit. i'm not such a good skater yet, but i'm practicing and getting better. there's gonna be "mud fest" coming up, with pudding wrestling and a kissing booth. i just want to take photos! and skate of course.
my new house rules. i live with lizzy and adam 2000, and their dogs pam and yuri. i'm in the basement, but it's finished and i have my own real kitchen down here plus a bathroom and a darkroom (???i know!) and i just do my stuff and get to hang out with a friend when i want to. and of course play with the dogs. tonight lizzy got white slippers that matched pam. pam's a little dog, a maltese.