Friday, November 10, 2006


There's alot of things i want to talk about tonight, like:
gay thugs,
boys who can't be your friend,
boys who only want to be your friend,
boys who only want to be more than your friend.
but tonight ellie and i done did hang out, it's strange, cuz after i don't hang out with miss e for a while, we don't see eye to eye for a while. that might sound strange, but it's true. tonight i explained some drama to her, and she was like, why don't you just deal with it for two more weeks? and i didn't have a good answer for her besides "it was a house decision". ellie's always a grounding force in my life, a voice of logic.
today on the bus to the haight, i got all emotional thinking about love and love lost. then i picked out the most expensive boots i could find. healing i tell you.
when ellie and i went out tonight, we spent some time talking to a nice young man whom i could very well get a massive crush on. ellie and him are friends from college, so they talked about their old friends and stuff, and every time i decided to barge in on the conversation, i did so in the usual way of talking about something different, and in a very winded and unwound way. it ruled. that really gets the boys i tell you, interrupting conversations with irrelevant anctedotes that don't make sense in the first place. i don't know, i was nervous. damn, and i just realized i never bought a round of drinks. shoot.
maybe i wanted to add a few things to the above list about things i want to talk about, but they're things i don't really care about specifically and i'd just want to talk shit about them in context of someone who i'm mad at right now.
the other day, at the coffee hole, a corporate person came in to do some testing or something. she is a rule following bitch, who said things like, "you can't chew gum on the floor" and "it's not quite the consistency of melted ice-cream" and made me hate her, but then there's those weird things like how she shakes hands that seals the deal. she was wearing this shirt with the sleeves rolled up 1/4 way, but in a way that made her look short armed like a tyranasauraus rex, and she shook my hand by giving me just the last two joints of her cold limp fingers, then flinching at my grip (i've been told i have a "good" handshake), i didn't have any choice but to think she's a total chum sucking choad. and tonight when i told ellie about this woman, and gave her a demonstration of the handshake, she laughed. so then i had to show her how this woman's arms looked so short in the big sleeves, and ellie bats my hand and says, "shh, stop it." and i'm like, "huh?? the arms were really short, like this!!!" and put my arms up high and wiggle my hands in front. she says, "taura!" and points her head at someone right behind me. i freeze, knowing it's the bitch from work, with her limp ass hand shake and short ass arms. and of course, when i turn around... there's a guy with actual short arms, like his mom took some pregnancy drugs but it made his arms the exact lame length as i was pretending the woman from work looked like. what a laugh. next thing i know there'll be all these actuall retarded people surounding me and whoop-doo-dee-doo, there's goes my jokes for 3 years. haaa, just kidding. i didn't mean it, i need to go to sleep and none of this makes very much sense. tha's my excuse.

tomorrow morning i will come back and edit... not now.

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