it's early. at least too early for me, 7:30am on a saturday morning. it seems like i just went to bed, and i did. our pesky church neighbors are congregating in front of our house (and their church), waking me up with their chatting. everyone has their car or truck parked on the sidewalks for the whole block, trunks open and full of suitcases and bags. i'm hoping they're packing up and going back to el salvador. my phone is mad at me, beeping and telling me how many phone messages i have, all from the same person. all messages i deliberately avoided last night, leaving my phone at home while euna and i went to walgreens and bought candy and what i call "panty savers". there's a lynda barry drawing about marly when she tries be friends with a crazy dog in an alley, and has to take all this time and care to come pet it with out it biting her. when the dog finally lets her pet it and she gets up to leave, it starts growling and getting scary eyes and won't let her go. found it! (god i'm good! cept it was a cousin and not marlys...)

that lynda barry is sure great. i think about that story all the time. now the church people is all gone, and i finished the cupcake i took home from work, and am about to drink some tea i took home from work. and i guess it's good that i got up early, cuz i have to be at work by 6 tomorrow morning and i'm not sleepy at night unless i got up early. i stayed up late last night with euna, she heard me on the phone and we went to walgreens and then ate tons of snacks while watching cable tv and she told me it's the right thing to leave the phone upstairs. if there's nothing i can do about it, i try not to miss people. ellie's on tour, and i really want to talk to her, but i just have to wait until she gets home. i miss ted, he spends entirely too much time with his girlfriend, so i'll just have to wait until he comes home to change clothes or something. i miss my family, but that's why we have technology. i missed you, and against my better judgement, i knew it was possible to see you if i called. and i called and it was a mistake and i'm so sorry. i'm so sorry about everything. i miss holding you, but i don't want to get back together with you. i miss the being that is you, but i don't miss the fighting and i don't miss the bad, and i don't miss the struggle to keep things together. i missed being in a relationship, and there's a you-shaped hole in my heart, but what i don't miss is how i used to miss me. i hated missing taura when we were together. and i've made a million analogys about it, and they're all true because that's just how things are, like a 20 sided dice. you probably won't read this, but that's ok. not talking to you is part of the process. and so is missing you.

shoes, getting dirtier at what i now call the coffee hole

today at work, i saw that i had been assigned to the bar. i hate bar. damn. who's on counter?
"so erik," i say "you're on counter"
"yes"
"do you want to be on bar?"
"no,"
"yeah," i say, "it's too hard for you. you better stay on counter, easy stuff. it's better for you."
erik just looks at me.
"yes i like counter"
"yeah yeah, i know, they want me on bar because they know i can handle it. you're on counter because it's difficult for you to make all the drinks, yeah, it's too hard for you."
when i got back from taking out the trash, erik was at the bar and my shift lead told me i was on counter.
success.
the other day i looked at how many coffee-to-go boxes i had to make, and it was alot.
"hey kevin," i say to him "remember that day when you didn't stock coffee-to-go boxes?"
"no, i stocked them" he replies
"yeah right, i don't think you know how to make them."
"oh really?" kevin says "what are you talking about? i make those every night!"
"well, i bet i make them faster than you. you're like, "doo-dee-doo-do-do-da" when you make them! ha!"
and next thing you know, we're having a box making contest, and my coffee-to-go's are finished.
success.
and then we went bowling and drank beer.


i found a bandaid that i bought in nicaragua earlier this year, and put it on some heinous hangnail i had. later that day i realized the bandaids are the masking tape with little holes and a piece of cotton in the middle. how economical.

we went to a launch party the other night, for chow magazine. it was really nice, and we ate a bunch of little things on sticks. like lamb and shrimp and something delicious called a potato pillow which was not on a stick. and drinks, plenty of drinks.
bets and teds

"what kind of purse is that?"
"it's a knock-off"

day 3 at the coffee shop

Things and stuff 4

new shoes after one day at the coffee shop.

the other day euna and i were looking at a purse at some shop when she throws it down in disgust saying, "this ruching is totally pointless!!"
what do you do when you realize you like patchouli smell? in incense, not hippie oil. and what do you do when you realize you like froofy espresso drinks with hazelnut? HAZELNUT.
caltrain is really fun. i wish the ride was longer so i could chill out on the second level and look out the window. maybe it's time for another train trip.

dang! there are more of them than i thought. diz iz my bike.

tonight the neighbors next door are having a really annoying rave type thing. there was a guy standing outside with gigantic skulls painted on his clothes, one on the back of his shirt, and one on the back of each of his legs. this is not a kind of party i want to go to.
last night there was the bestest scifi program playing on i-mystery, i HAVE to get a copy of it. i'm all about old sci-fi radio programs, and the internet is a grrreat place to listen to them. there's the kinds made practically for kids about communist spider aliens, and the "journey into space" sagas are awesome, and then you have the episodes of "escape", which are the best. but last night i heard a new type, it was the dramatic reading and dramatic band playing. there'd be a few sentences read, like, "the night sky cracked open like a hammer had stuck it like a gong, lightening searing the landscape searching wickedly for humans." and then the band would start playing music and sounds that reflected the statment, going on for 5 minutes or so with lots of theramin. then another clue to the story: "it was ships from beyond, terrifying and ruthless in their hunger for human death. martians." and the band would play scary music some more, and in the second hour of the program, there was less and less narrator and more and more singers telling the story (badly). "like the sun through the trees warming the moist spring soil you came to me, to make me smile. like the sun through the trees, you are gone" and a man sings these words out in anguish over a slapping bass line, because he thought his lady got blown up by martians(but she was ok it turns out, and then we get to hear some duets). and it keeps on going, 20 seconds of of dialog and explanation, and 5 minutes of space opera sounds. it was very theramin, very funky, very dramatic and very long. i had to turn it off to go to sleep. but i can't believe the amount of work someone put into that program, i bet it's on record someplace.
ellie and i went to the mall downtown today, getting some items and checking out the new parts. we went to the bloomingdales, and i expected alot. i must say, all the purses and bags were hideous. only a few le sport bags were ok, and they were still $160 for not quite the right thing. the mall is crazy, you can't find your way out and it's like time doesn't pass, it's like a casino. it's crazy.
making friends at work

..."these are a few of my favorite things"...