Sunday, December 31, 2006

Year in Review

WOW!! So, what are you doing on New Years Eve? Yeah, I don't know either. For now you can look at this awesome blog featuring my thoughts on things that happened in 2006, and a few predictions.

Books:

the Alchemist-this was hokey, plain and simple. With fakey symbolism and myths, even thinking about how to describe it irritates me. It was really popular among housewives, written to make them feel all deep and intelligent. The only redeeming thing about the book is how it emphasizes the importance of following through with your personal dream, though it's described as your "Personal Legend". Kill me please.

Idiots Guide to World War 1-I really liked this book, it's perfect bedtime reading. You can read little interesting chunks that are interesting enough to entertain, yet sustained reading is boring enough to put you to sleep. Then you have crazy dreams about trenches and the Great Wheel.

Sounds:

Old Time Radio-this is the best ever. Go to your itunes radio and look under talk/spoken word and check out "Mystery Play I-Radio", "AM 1710 Antioch OTR", "ACB Radio Treasure-Trove" and you can listen to great old time radio 24 hours a day. When I was little, every Sunday night I had to tune my clock radio to some AM station to get only an hour of programming. Now, it's like a dream come true. After listening to old time radio programs for a while, you realize how actors today don't master their voices like they used to. And this is a fact. I wish someone was still doing radio dramas, but the only people who do good voices are commercial voice-overs and people who make audio books.

Technicolor Web of Sound- a m a z i n g. 60's and 70's psychcadelic rock, though sometimes they slip in some Monkees songs. They also have old commercials that blow your mind, like Tim Leary talking about acid and Janice Jopplin making a Levis commercial.

Food:

Olives-Olives have been a hit all through the years, and that didn't change in 2006.

Leafy Greens-They're great, all the different kinds. Russian red kale, regular kale, mustard greens, spinach, collard greens, it's all good. And so easy to make.

Brie-You don't love brie? Give me a break. Get out of here.

Clues:

Shoes-You can still tell if you want to date a guy or not by his shoes. You have to be careful though, the good styles are becoming more poplular with people you may not want to date. You just have to refine and define what kind of shoes are ok.

Olives-Be suspicious of someone who is over 8 years old and does not like olives. If they don't like olives, chances are they don't like alot of good things that you like including garlic, gin, and crafts.

Advice:

Bad Friends- cut-it-out!! Cut your "bad friends" out of your life, cuz bad friends are just enemies in disguise. And you don't need to waste any of your time trying to do that old saying, "the easiest way to get rid of your enemy is to make them your friend." When people close to you stop respecting you, make you feel low and like there's something wrong with you, cut-it-out. It's hard enough to keep afloat without trying to battle some asshole pushing your head underwater. The hardest part is to hold onto your decision when they pretend they're nice people and you want to trust them again. It's ok to be civil to them, but don't start spilling your guts cuz that's when they'll turn around and hand you a shit sandwich. Be nice, but remember, cut-it-out!

Keep-It-Moving: My friend Kevin asked me if I'd heard the phrase "keep it moving" one day when I spent about 45 minutes getting worked up about some ex-boyfriend. "When it comes to your past, remember that it's ok to look, but impolite to stare. Keep it moving." This is excellent advice, and good words to tell yourself every so often.

Stars:

Britney Spears- She did some embaressing stuff, and had a couple of babies with a fucking idiot, but so what. Who hasn't done things that are better forgotten? As long as I don't have to think about how stupid she is, I like her. She's trashy, but at least she's not trying to rap.

Paris Hilton- I can't wait for her to die in 2007.

Mission Celebs- Chris McVicker brought up how much he hates Mission Celebs, and I had never thought of it that way. There's all these people here in San Francisco's Mission District who think they're sumptin' else! People who think they're really cool always get stuck in my craw, no matter if they're cool or not. Get over yourself. You are not a real celeb.

Legolas- Word, he still rules. Notice how he runs.

Internet:

2006 saw continued interest in the internet, and it's still a cool place to hang out and waste time.

War:

War still rages on and on, it's not a popular thing to be a part of now or ever.

Movies:

Green Street Hooligans- This was a terrible movie, the Hobbit was in it and it was really hard to believe he was an English FootBall Hooligan and could beat anyone up. But the guy he played opposite of was really hot, I felt the same kind of guilt liking him as liking Edward Norton in American History X.

Pursuit of Happyness- It was not uplifting like some people said, I felt all nauseous when it was over because I had spent the entire movie worrying about my own monetary problems. Even though it turned out ok in the movie, I think Will Smith took irresponsible risks with his family's well-being to follow a few pipe-dreams. This is an unpopular opinion I'm sure.

In short, 2006 did not live up to my expectations, but that's cuz I had high expectations for 2006 just like you have high expectations for the 4th of July and New Years Eve. But don't worry, 2007 is going to be a nice year, full of vegetables and friends and money and good luck.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

christmas in la


the whole time, i had "walking in la" by missing persons stuck in my head, but it was too perfect not to sing "christmas in la" instead, to myself.
i went with rickard the swede and his swedish friends, and stayed with some other swedes in venice beach. i heard such interesting things as,
"cocaine, has anyone ever tried it?"
"don't you have any 'system of a down' on your ipod?"
"augh, you 'yumped' on my balls!" (no one understood why this was funny)

oh ha ha ha, the hilarity just don't stop. during our christmas eve dinner, i decided to say some words (or 'grace' as some say) and thanked everyone for coming together to have a nice holiday when we're all so far away from our families, and making a nice dinner and all that. it was short and sweet, but somehow everyone took it like it was stewart smalley up there trying to make a moment. when i called my family, they were all sitting around together, drinking and watching tv i'm sure. they just kept saying, "what ARE you doing in la with a 21 year old swedish boy? huh?" and my dad asked if he came to la if 21 year old swedish girls would like him. i had glamorized the event in my mind, telling people "i'm going to la for christmas with a swedish teenager", and it was this thing i held up as the way my life goes here in california, and i just better kiss it goodbye when i move to nebraska. but i'd like to make a lesson out of this experience. "christmas in la" is just that. no one told me there'd be "sewage sprayed on you", "not leaving the apt until 3:30pm", and "dealing with the socially inept". what good is being in venice beach with bunch of hot swedish boys if you're just sitting in a darkened room watching "family guy" dvds?(yes, plural). i don't know. i don't want to make it sound like i had a bad time, cuz i didn't. but a lo-light was on christmas day when i got food poisoning from too many meatballs and eggnog gone wrong. what's the lesson? hollywood isn't what its cracked up to be? i feel all strange lately, trying to pack up all my crap, thinking about leaving sf and all the fun i'm supposed to be having. last week i found my second white hair. today i made tasha mad by being mean. why can't i be all sweet and sincere like i was at dinner on christmas eve, talking about how important family is. why can't christmas in la be magical and just like i imagined it.



Monday, December 18, 2006






rickard, the swede, who was completely blown away when i started talking swedish to him yesterday at golden gate park.
"yes, poop, drawer. you are cute." actually, i don't think i said "you are cute", because even though i know it (and a few other things bad people have taught me), i was too embarrassed.
we went to the deyoung, it was awesome. someone said it's better than the moma, and i'm almost about ready to agree. we looked at the gee's bend quilts, and i snuck a few photos because they were so awesome. the pink and red drawing/painting is by ruth asawa, the main part of her work was these hanging woven wire sculptures that i wasn't able to sneak a photo of. the last is from the best of the bay party at club six last september.

x-cellent x-mas parties

stage dancers!
aeschleah!
nick with the polaroid that aeschleah took of us
taura and lynda!
sister saki tumi!
from the good vibes party

eye-deas

get it? like "ideas" but with the word "eye" for "i" because it's about eyes. ideas about make-up on eyes. i got a bunch of eyeshadow at the make-up convention. for free!!

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

yes, the rumors are true. i'm leaving sf. i'm going back to nebraska. and when i say this, people want to pull me aside and try to convince me not to. like i'm throwing my life away.
tonight i hung out with a fellow lincolnite, linda. she's awesome and saw my band play at paul tisdale's house in like, 1993 or something, crazy. she is also moving back, and we spent alot of time talking about the pros and cons of moving "back home". on my ride back to my place, on that stupid bmx bike i'm riding right now, i thought about how much i'm going to miss all the amazing people i've met here, and how i'm going to miss eli and naomi, and how i'm going to miss people i don't hang out or call enough. and for a little bit on that hecka long ride home cuz of 15" wheels, i kind of felt like this place just might be my home. or at least i've got used to it...
i have a crush on a boy... a boy here, not ne.
ciao.

Thursday, November 30, 2006



career girl


so it would seem that my specialty as a receptionist is to hang up on people. really. by accident!! see, i sort of bullshitted my way into the gig (did i just say 'gig'?) and claimed to know how to use the fucking switchboard they have for the agency, so i can't really go back and ask questions like, "so, what does it do when i press this button 3 times?" when you have a question, for someone, you better be prepared to explain why you're asking, and how the situation was previously resolved.
me: "where should I send someone who calls to verify the employment status of someone?"
other: "why, did someone call?"
me: "um yes?"
other: "where did you send them?"
me: "I don't know? i hung up on them or sent them to the ceo's voicemail?"
oops. i just have this fear that my utterly non-qualified ass is going to get exposed and i'll be publicly humiliated. it seems like i've been there for a month, and it's only been 3 days. it's pretty boring, i spend alot of time alternating between staring at the phone terrified that it's going to ring, and drawing on post-it notes. today i brought in some desk decor, a mini holiday tree. (see above) next i need that pin thing that you can put your hand in. and some white sneakers to wear when i go out to lunch with the other ladies in my office.


and ps, i did this all on my OWN time!!!

Friday, November 24, 2006


yes wow, i finally did it. i learned how to ride with nooo hands! not very well, but it's a start.
everyone's out of town for thanksgiving, even people i don't want to spend it with... so instead of hanging out at home by myself, i invited myself to house sit for my friends eli and naomi in menlo park. turns out the position had already been taken, but eli and naomi figured their cats would have a better chance of being alive with 2 semi-responsible people feeding them than just one semi-responsible person. so bradford and i have spent the week pretending to be eli and naomi! i am currently waiting for them to get home so we can drink some wine.
i've finally given in to myspace, it feels like i'm cheating on my friendster account.

Sunday, November 19, 2006



Tuesday, November 14, 2006

sssssssssssnake oil.

my first assignment from the temp agency was quite random, working at a cosmetics convention.






overheard:
"all I know is that it's enzymamnatic and good for de-crustation."
"chicos has the most attractive extras."
"where has she been?? that's a half hour of sales that she's never going to get back. ever."
it was the strangest thing, the people attending the convention were the most unattractive and unstylish people ever. they owened spas, hair salons, nail botiques, were make-up artists, and attending beauty school, but i couldn't imagine consulting them about anything besides slurpee flavors. there were gadgets to steam clean the skin germ off you, and $3000 shaking machines to liquify your cellulite and thin-ize your thighs. creams and pastes made out of seaweed and apricots and placenta to clear up or soften up or firm up your skin. blacklights to whiten your teeth, dry your nails, and prevent wrinkles.
thank god i was just selling make-up.
i developed a little demonstration for the "glitz fix" and glitter we had, it went like this:
"have you seen our "glitz fix" yet?" and the person would go "no" and i'd say, "let me show you. first you take our "glitz fix" and apply it to your skin," and i make a squiggle with the "glitz fix" on the back of my hand. "you can't see it now, but when you use it with our loose glitter," and i'd take a pinch of glitter and sprinkle it over the squiggle and then blow off all the loose glitter to leave the glue part all encrusted with shiny glitter. and your hand is still in a shimmering cloud of glitter, and it looks magical and you show the small crowd of people how cool it looks, and say, "the "glitz fix" adheres the glitter to your skin. it's really dramatic looking, right?" and people would put one "glitz fix" into their basket along with a few glitters. i got it down fairly good, until some lady asked how you're supposed to use it on your eyes.
"oh your eyes. well, uh, oooooof course, well, you'd want to be alot more...careful." because i don't really know anything about the make-up i was selling, as i had never used an "eye base" or "lash primer" or "lip sealer" or any of the things ladies who use alot of make-up use to help all their make-up stay on better. lord.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

the light in the end of the coffee hole has come... i just finished my last shift. !!!
and celebrated by making a drink on my bike.

this also ends the tale of the little keds i wore, they will no longer be subjected to spills or have slops of grounds poured on them. this is the last pic of them dirty from coffee:

and here they are after a washing...

i was kind of sad during the beginning of the day, the last week or so i had been trying to think of a customer that i should ask out just because i'd be leaving. there is one who seems a little older than me, he orders a large coffee with 2 shots and always tips a dollar. but he has a girlfriend. there's another boy that kind of looks like what you imagine harry potter to look like from the books (not the movies), he orders a small coffee and reads the paper for a long time and rides a bike. but he didn't come in my last day. but then one of my favorite boys came in, the little latin one who dresses so sharp, like a leader of a 70's drug cartel. but i think he's probably like 16 or something. "just my type" you'd think, but honestly i really don't want to make the time in my busy life for a whining boy who'll shrink my world. so i didn't ask anyone out my last day.
peter, the best shift lead in the world, came in to say goodbye, he was dressed in an expensive cashmere sweater and looked so handsome and nice, i hugged him and told him how soft he was.
at the end of the shift, we took shots of tequila while we cleaned up. everyone is always so proper at work, no one REALLY wants to break the rules, people do, but in minor ways that don't make things easier or more fun for anyone. it's a very managed atmosphere. there's cameras everywhere that the central office can look in on all the time, and the shift leaders are all concerned about their jobs and care about their permanent record in life. i always tried to convince people that we should take down the big delicious poster of the pain in the ass drink, but everyone was like, "noooo, we can't do that" and there's no team effort to close early or drink on the clock. everything's all micro managed, just the way i hate it . but the shots were fun. i wish we did them more often.
besides the anti-shenanagin atmosphere, everyone from work is really nice and i'm sad to not work with them anymore, though i'm really quite happy not to have to work at the coffee hole. lately i drift off to sleep tossing and turning thinking about making drinks wrong. i won't miss that. after i got home the night of my last shift, i lay in bed smiling, unable to sleep. i tossed and turned, but i couldn't relax for thinking about all the timers i hid around the store to go off at various times during peter's shift during the next day. har-dee-har-har!!! i even threw one above the lights, wrapped up in a bag and timed to go off at 3ish. the beeping will be faint and barely detectable and in an unlikely and inconvenient place. i could barely get to sleep for all the happiness.

likes sizzurp.

sooo soft.

wouldn't let me take a photo of her.

was surprised when i asked him if he's from nebraska. can you blame me?

http://sfsquirt.blogs.friendster.com/soundtracks_for_modern_li/

is really an old school san francisco native.

where's jadie's picture?!?

NEWSFLASH!!!
euna just barged into my room and was all, look at this!! and holding a box that had been sitting on our foosball table for the last few days, addressed to someone who doesn't live here. it was for a neighbor who no one likes anymore, and now we had a box that was meant for him. so we opened it. it said it was from "edible specials" or something, and when i lifted the lid, a little fly escaped, and inside was a bunch of chocolate coated strawberries and stuff! we squealed and went to dig in, but then noticed the pieces were dripping juice. on further inspection, the strawberries had mold and the apples were soggy. but dang! it was some gourmet shit, in little paper thingies and all. what a waste. if we had only ate them when we first go the package, it would have been fine. so euna and i pulled the wilted strawberries out of their chocolate shells like fruity escargot, and went to the bathroom sink and rinsed the chocolate off with water. and besides the velvety soft inside, it was a delicious snack. DEEEE-licious. and if this becomes evidence of mail theft, euna is innocent.